A Few Shuckable Oysters

With the almost unstoppable craze surrounding the circus known as Jon and Kate Plus 8, one could almost forget about an equally terrifying family de force, the Duggars from 18 Kids and Counting. Where Jon and Kate's crumbling marriage was sabotaged by bio genetically engineered sextuplets, the Duggars left the fate of their brood in the broad hands of God. Guess which family is not going through a nasty public divorce.

I'm not saying that God favors the Duggars over the Gosselins, but, then again, I'm not saying He doesn't. The Duggars are celebrating 25 years of marriage. The Gosselins made it through, what, ten years? I suppose time is relative, though. Remember, one season of TLC programming is like a thousand years for the Lord (Peter 3:8).

Sure, the Duggars are Children of the Corn-styled religious zealots hellbent on repopulating the Earth with people named Jedidiah, Jackson and Jinger (yes, it's Ginger, but with a J), but their is something magical about their devotion to each other. That and Michelle Duggar is sort of a babe. At 43 years of age, Michelle Duggar is an all natural beauty. Kate Gosselin is nice looking, but you sort of expect that from someone who has had as much plastic surgery as her. If I had a $4,000 boob job, I'd probably give myself an erection. I'm just sayin'.

On another topic, has anyone heard about the FDA banning the sale of raw oysters from the Gulf of Mexico? You can still eat the oysters, but they have to be treated with gamma radiation first. And for someone like Jim Bob Duggar, that's like having sex with a condom. Sure, it's still good, but it's just not the same.