Monday, January 4, 2010

Young Pussy and Old Vagina

With society placing more emphasis on youth, it's not surprising that the standard of beauty is somewhat less than mature. I remember fondly looking at my grandfathers old Playboy's and marveling at the lush and curly bushes. These girls weren't the 12 year olds I was too nervous to talk to, they were beautiful grown women with a dense underbrush. Now it's commonplace to shave your wiffer and throw some baby powder between your legs. Kinda reminds me of those 12 year old girls I was too nervous to talk to.

Former 12 year old and Disney star Miley Cyrus seems to be the unofficial spokeswomen for our Lolita-lust. Not only does she prance around in full makeup and short-shorts, she poses for Vanity Fair with no shirt on. More shocking was the photo from the same series with father Billy Ray Cyrus. In the photograph, Miley is apparently using her elbow to keep her father's ballsack warm.

Remember when all the comedians and late night talk show guys were blabbering on about the Olsen twins and the countdown until their eighteenth birthday? How long until we start counting down to the time where it's socially acceptable to start the aforementioned countdown? First we'll have to establish an age we find appropriate to start said countdown. This age, of course, will drastically reduce as time goes by. Let's start with 15. 15 will be the age where it's acceptable to think about having sex with a girl, but not to actually go through with it. That age is still set at 18, as outlined by your state law enforcement agency.

I think I'll start cruising the local nurseries. That way I'll have 15 years of anticipation and 3 years of sexually depraved fantasies before I can actually start pursuing her. Then, one lucky night I'll find myself removing her pink Care Bear panties only to find a woolly and unkempt bush staring back at me. Upon seeing this pubic hair, I will surely lose all interest. I think I might just skip all that and think about Anita Ekberg.

7 comments:

Supermom said...

How funny you should blog about this!!!!

We, as in my gf's, were talking bush the other day.

Nice curly hair verses the shaved I haven't hit puberty look that's popular now!

I also remember Playboy when it had "real" women posing. None of this fake boob airbrushed look it has going on right now.

Seriously, what's wrong with our bodies just the way they are??? I am very confident in the skin I am in even though I've had four children.

These boobs have nursed and cared for my babies, the way they were intended to be used.

This belly of mine has brought four wonderful babies into the world. The stretch marks I am left with is my badge of honor. I can even overlook the pouch that I have from having the four babies.

IMPO, I'd rather look at a real woman, a few extra pounds with a BUSH and all

than

some airbrushed woman that hasn't hit puberty yet.

How did I do?

Michael DeAntonio said...

You and your gf's sit around and talk about bush? And I thought the subject matter might be off putting for some.

Yeah, you hit the nail on the head.

Supermom said...

I'm a cool 35 year old is all I can say!!!

Save the BUSH!!

Wonder if my readers would kill over if I blogged about my new campaign?

Supermom said...

Mikey I blogged about the bush. Ha ha. Wonder if I lose a few readers by morning.

Kelly said...

She won't lose me!!

quin browne said...

i wish i understood the whole lusting after girls who couldn't connect in any way but giving men something to think about while they...

oh, wait... never mind. i answered my own question.

Michael DeAntonio said...

Quin- Not all men are scumbags. I am, but I'm sure there are other men who aren't. I'm pretty sure.