Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Potty Talk

Can your large intestines really wrap around the world when laid flat? Apparently, I'm not the only one who was told that as a child. I typed it in on the Internet and was met with numerous responses. They all pointed to no, but the fact that the question is being asked by other people is somewhat satisfying. Despite this, my wife's reply to my question was, "Are you serious?"

Well, I still stand by my belief that diarrhea always follows constipation. The back-up of stool at the sphincter causes the stool at the back of the line to linger in the "blender" that is your stomach acid. Therefore, when the stool at the back of the line finally gets to the front of the line, it is in diarrhea form. It makes sense to me. My wife thinks I'm an idiot, though.

So how long are your large intestines when laid flat? 23 feet. That's a tad shy of the circumference of the Earth, but it's still pretty impressive. How long is the typical male's erection? 6 to 7 inches. Hey, I think about these things. Especially when you're sitting on the toilet for a little "me time", it makes sense to think about what's dangling in the toilet.

5 comments:

Cheryl said...

You're going to be one of those dads who's always full of fascinating, slightly gross facts. Or "facts."

Supermom said...

Are you sure you're not related to my husband?!?!

~shaking head~

quin browne said...

i almost worry about you...except i think about the same things, minus the erection part.

Peter Varvel said...

Don't worry, Quin. I'll fill in for the things you don't think about, at least this one.
Mike, don't forget to include the base, or the taint, when measuring (I know I don't!).

Michael DeAntonio said...

Peter- Exactly. I never know where to start measuring. Sometimes I feel like if you include the base you might be cheating. It's an intense debate, i know.